There are different types of reviewers. Here is my guide to the categories most reviewers can be sorted into. Some people think of flames and constructive criticism as the same thing, and I have been accused of being one of those people. I can assure you I know the difference and have created this guide to help others see the difference between different types of reviews.

The Colin Creeveys

CCs praise the story to high heaven. They gush about the parts they think are good and don’t mention anything bad. Enthusiastic and useful for building confidence, but not useful for improvement.

Example: “This is a really excellent story! I cried when they kissed! Ooh, I wonder what will happen next? I can’t wait!”

ACCEPTABLE

The Hermione Grangers (no offence meant to the HP character)

HGs nag and pester for updates constantly. In small doses can be either passed over or slightly irritating, but too many reviews from HGs and the author gets extremely annoyed. Some CC-ish praise appears as well. These reviews will not be deleted but that does not mean they are allowed – HGs will get warned.

Example: “Oh, this is a really good story, can you please update SOON?”

UNACCEPTABLE

Like HGs but with one difference – the reviews are all about the updating and no praise, good or bad, appears in the review. Generally these reviews will just say “Update soon (please)!” and nothing else. These reviews will not find their way into the authors’ inboxes (unless the author has specifically asked) – they are a waste of space.

Example: “Oooh, update update update! Please!”

UNACCEPTABLE

The Luna Lovegoods

Leavers of constructive criticism, overall considered the best form of reviewer. LLs are honest and try to be helpful by pointing out areas to improve on. They make sure to point out the good points and encourage the author to continue.

Example: “I thought the beginning of the chapter was very well-written, but nearer the middle the flow didn’t seem quite right and there were some spelling errors (third paragraph after the scene break). Your OC doesn’t seem very developed, you might want to be careful of her turning into a Mary Sue. However the plot is very imaginative, I think this story has definite potential!”

HIGHLY ENCOURAGED

The Severus Snapes (don’t sue me, I’m a Snape fan too, but you can’t deny he’s rude!)

While HGs and RSs are generally positive in their pestering, SSs are not. Phrases such as “Hello, anyone there? Update already!” and lots of capitalisation is used. There is a fine line between HGs, RSs and SSs but the difference is, HGs/RSs just don’t think or are not aware of the effect of their reviews. SSs simply have no respect for the author at all. These reviews will not find their way into the authors’ inboxes (unless the author has specifically asked) – they are a waste of space.

Example: “How long are you going to keep us waiting????? UPDATE!!!!!”

UNACCEPTABLE

The Lord Voldemorts (also called the Trolls or the Flamers)

Laughed at by some, emotionally damaging to others. It depends on the experience and character of the author. Reviews left by these scorn and insult either the story, the author, or both. Bad language is often (but not always) used. No positive encouragement or good aspects of the story appear in their reviews (a.k.a flames). These reviews will not find their way into the authors’ inboxes (unless the author has specifically asked) – they are a waste of space.

Example: “Eek, how old are you? This story looks like it was written by a four-year-old, it’s pathetic!”

LVs WILL BE BANNED WITHOUT WARNING – THERE ARE NO EXCUSES